I lay down disappointment and press down hard to write tranquility
Roll away the black drawing paper, and underneath lies clear marks
Language whirls and creates dizzying terms
The moment one forlornly becomes a word
From afar, it resembles eraser powder
But all this is actually my silently exhaled breath, you see
My days and days of surviving, precarious but never breaking, you see
Have you ever seen someone leap without knowing where they'll land
Running in energetic strides, sinking faintly
That is to say, with pinkish nails bearing crescent moons
picking at pale blue lips
The hot pack that Mom gave me cooled and became hard
and I layer again in the pajamas I wore all winter
and I know the morning from the sound of bus engines
and the light in the rectangular room never goes out
and the callus in the middle finger grows another layer
Forcing shut my eyelids that won't close
I open my eyes with them closed
and switch to and fro the afterimages in the black screen
When I have reached a place that makes no sense
Say, for example, when I have met the one
that I'd so longed for, the one that I cannot meet
Blip
as if to black out
I
fall
to
sleep
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